Ryan and I were talking last night how it almost seems like the transition to 2 kids has been easier than when we went from 0 to 1. Yes, I realize we have lots of stages in the future that will be doubly challenging, but for this posts sake, I'm referring to The Beginning.
I keep wondering... what the hell was all the commotion about when we brought Porter home? We acted like it was terribly life altering... and I guess at the time yes, it was, and also considering I was pretty much bed ridden with a migraine for the first week it was necessary that we had a little bit of extra help... but for the most part... WHAT was the commotion? I remember coming home and my mom had cleaned our entire house, someone (my mom? Ry's parents?) had bought groceries for us. My aunt brought a ginormous fruit bowl over. My mom stayed with us to out to help with dishes and keeping the house picked up. We had numerous visitors daily for the first week.
So, my experience with bringing home a newborn was a bit... like a big production. I anticipated this huge, life altering day when we brought Hudson home. I was making lists and trying to get things done that I "thought I wouldn't be able to get to for weeks...." SO FUNNY!
We brought Hudson home and we've had nary a visitor. We've had zero cleaning crew or grocery shopping attendants. Sure, my mom stopped by. My grandma stopped by. Ry's parents stopped by. Other than that, we've been on our own and honestly, life has just pretty much resumed to what it was on May 19th, 2008: Before Hudson. We wake up around the same time. We do the same things during the day (well, Ry's been packing). We've been playing outside (well, Porter has, and I just sit), I've had time to blog like normal. Ry's had time to do house chores like normal. I've made dinner at night and we've been doing our normal house chores as usual. We've even taken turns taking naps during the day.
Is it really that bringing home the second child is so much easier? Is bringing home the 1st baby that overrated, or is it really that much of a life altering event?
Just some random ponderings. This could suffice for my Thought for Thursday, right?
I TOTALLY agree, that's so funny. I was saying to Brad the other night "What was I so BUSY with when I had a newborn?"?! Cause really, compared to a toddler, they are pretty boring!
ReplyDeleteThe only things I find a bit tough is if you have a rough night with the baby and are tired, your patience gets a little thin for the other one.
That and getting out of the house and somewhere on time with two can sometimes be a bit more challenging but overall, no big deal at all.
I think it's because you know what you are into the second time around. You are used to being more tired, used to not having time to yourself etc.
Oh and also with #2, you don't feel the need to hold them every second and all that - poor neglected children HAHA
I have often wondered what it would be like with baby # 2 because it WAS a huge life alterting thing with Gavin. Do you think it will still be easy bringing home baby # 2 and # 3 at the same time? HAHAHA! I can hope right?
ReplyDeletei'm so glad you posted this. i was just thinking literally two hours ago as we were trying to get some things done around the house... what is it going to be like with TWO kids? is it going to be CRAZY?? i feel better now. :)
ReplyDeleteand yeah i think the difference is probably just the life change. with the first one you have to get used to being a parent... definitely a life-altering event. :)
When we had Lukas it was the same way!!! My mom came over for like 3 weeks and helped with dishes, cleaning, whatever you name! And I often thought if that is needed for the 2nd one. Good to hear you guys are adapting so well!!
ReplyDeleteVery good observation! Bringing Cooper home was defintely a big deal - so much so that it felt like poor Maren got the shaft! The adjustment from none to 1 was huge - probably because we had never done it before. But to go from 1 to 2? Piece of cake! We have definitely gone through periods of adjustment, but it has now gotten to the point that I don't remember life before two kids!
ReplyDeleteThis is a perfect Blog about a funny little phenomenon that occurs with Moms of more than one child.
ReplyDeleteThat's why experienced Moms and Grandparents find it so funny when pregnant mothers-to-be or new mothers become panic-striken at the idea of coloring their hair while pregnant, develop paranoia over the the idea of a litter box/myth that the cat might smother the baby, swear on their lives that they'll never spank their "little miracle" and/or promise themselves that they will always maintain perfect a house even after they have children!!
It's not to insult or mock those women that believe those things...it's just that eventually you finally realize that life's going to be different, you can't be uptight about the harmlessly silly things and that a lot of those beliefs and plans you once held dear or feared as a childless couple beforehand will have to be adjusted and that compromises will be made more often than not. ;)
It just isn't as complicated as some new mothers make it out to be as opposed to the second (or more) time Moms that have gotten used to the reality of change that a child brings to their life