Green and White

Are these blooms and blossoms not the most beautiful thing ever?  Especially in March.  In Michigan?!?!  It makes me happy.  It makes me smile.  It keeps me cheerful and optimistic. So crazy how the weather can change your mood.  I have not felt too affected by SAD this year, because we've had such a mild winter (though... I did miss having the occasional snow day!!)

Looking back on last year (thankful I blog and scrapbook... because I've referenced both quite often lately!)
Crappy snowstorm April 18th

This picture was taken April 28th last year.... finally green blooms on the trees on my way to pick Porter up from school.

Finally feeling the spring weather... May 11th 

3 Years. I miss her.

In some sense, it feels like this day was forever ago.  And in some sense it was.  And in another, it seems like it was just yesterday... the pain and heartache and sadness and anger so fresh.  After the grieving and they "Why's" and the anger and all those stages... after the acceptance... life does go on.  It does.  But I'm always reminded of how much she has missed. Every time the boys say or do something crazy or funny I imagine how much she would have loved to have been here, to know them, to watch them grow.  

And what about how much my boys have missed?  Hudson was a baby... 4 months old.  He knows Nina only from pictures.  And Porter, well, at 2.5 I doubt much of his memories are his own but those of stories we've told them.  I hope they both know how much their Nina loved them. 

When I look at her pictures, when I imagine her here with us, laughing with us and joking and just being here with us... when I imagine it how it SHOULD be, how we WANT it to be... it makes me so sad.  It makes me miss her so much.  I miss our near daily phone calls... our simple chats or her wise advice.  I miss calling her to ask her recipes or questions or how to do things.  I miss calling her to rant about bad days, or to share with her stories about the kids.  I miss being able to tell her goodbye... a real goodbye.  I miss her.  

I was going to add some pictures, but I thought I'd link back to my post about her.  I still can't read it without crying.  Will I ever?  

And I don't think I'll ever look at a balloon in the sky and not think "It's coming up to you, Cathy!"   After her funeral, we let the kids each release a balloon up to Heaven to Nina (or Nana, as the girls called her).  I can't believe how little they all were.  How long ago it seems, yet just like yesterday. 

‎3 years ago today. I'll forever wonder what life would be like if she were still here, just as I will always know that an important part of our family is not with us. We'll love you forever, Mom Bzzzz (Nina). 

My Baaaaaby!

I was looking through old pictures tonight and found this one of Hudson.  He was 14 months old.  Look at his wispy, blonde hair!  His porcelain skin and his big blue eyes.  So so sweet!  The drool... awww!  And the sucky (I didn't realize we'd let him keep his sucky that long). And at the bottom you can see he's playing with an Automoblox.  Still one of his favorite toys! 

Oh my Hudson Bessie... I can't believe how much he's grown.  In my eyes he's still 14 months old.  How does time go by so quickly? 

50 Reflections on 2010

It's that time already. Keeping with my tradition from 2007, 2008 and 2009, here we go...

1. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Last year it was to set some "goals" for this year... to get back into shape; to curse less; to yell less and be more patient with my kids.


2. What was the single best thing that happened this past year? I can't say there is a SINGLE best thing, but its been a good year. Probably our vacations/family trips... to Emerald Isle, Chicago, Silver Lake, Custer, two Girls Weekends and DC. I feel blessed we've been able to travel so much and do so much together as a family.

3. What was the single most challenging thing that happened? Probably going back to work with both of my regular sitters unable to care for the boys for a couple months. That was stressful, both emotionally and monetarily.

4. What was an unexpected joy this past year? Camping with family. Okay, this isn't totally "unexpected" but we did two LONG camping trips and we had a blast both times. The second trip we had rain all but one day, and despite the awful weather, we really had a great time and made some wonderful memories.



5. What was an unexpected obstacle? Dealing with betrayal and hurt dealt from someone I thought was a good friend. Learning to move on and let go, learning to lean on those who have my best interest in mind. Having to walk away from a 14+ year friendship.


6. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?
 Began taking Master's classes. Also went on a Mom/Daughter weekend with my mom and sister.


7. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010? More patience and money. And time. I'd love more time.


8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?


9. What was your biggest failure?
 Gaining weight. Yelling at my kids.

10. Did anyone close to you give birth?
 Katie (Adrian Michael) and Jane (Lyla Claire and Jillian Kate)

11. Did anyone close to you die?
 No, thank God.

12. What states/countries did you visit?
 North Carolina, Virginia, Washington DC,

13. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?



14. How did you spend Christmas?
 Christmas Eve was at Lori and Don's house. Christmas Day we stayed home, in our pj's. Very relaxing day!

15. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
 I turned... 29. Ryan and I went out to dinner with the Huffs, as Don and I share the same birthday.

16. Did you suffer illness or injury?
 Hmmm nope not really.

17. What was the best thing you bought?
 My 50mm f/1.4. Love it!

18. Whose behavior merited celebration?
 Porter's. He has blossomed so much in preschool this year!

19. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
 Leslie's. I'd never have expected her to stab me in the back the way she did.


20. Where did most of your money go?
 Mortgage and bills. Where else would it go?

21. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
 Christmas Day... seeing the excitement the boys had and how magical the holiday was for them this year.

22. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? 
 happier
b) thinner or fatter? 
 fatter
c) richer or poorer?
 poorer (how do I keep getting poorer every year!?)

23. What was your biggest personal change from January to December of this past year? As always, being the best mom I can be to my boys. I'll never be perfect, this I know. But I want to give them the best of me. I don't always do this, and I'll forever be working on this.

24. In what way(s) did you grow:

• emotionally? I think I've become more in control of my feelings/anger/actions. I've learned to let things go and how cliche "not sweat the small stuff."
• spiritually? I've really lacked in this department and hope to grow more in this category this year.
• physically? Zip. Didn't do squat to grow physically. This must change.

25. In what way(s) did you grow in your relationships with others? Ryan and I grew closer as parents as we tackled some challenges we had with Porter. The parenting class and counseling has been such a wonderful thing for our relationship to help us realize we really are a great team, we really do work well together and we ARE great parents, despite our downfalls and shortcomings.

26. With whom were your most valuable relationships? First and foremost, my husband and kids. Second would be my girlfriends- the best ever, Katie, LeeAnn and Jane.

27. Did you fall in love in 2010?
 Nope. Already there :-)

28. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
 Hate is a strong word. But there is one person I'm severely disappointed and sadded by, and another person who has done things to make me dislike them very much.



29. Who did you miss?
 Cathy

30. Who was the best new person you met?
 Dot! She was (is) a lifesaver. She has opened up my eyes to so many parenting issues and helped me overcome many obstacles (and many more to come).

31. What was the most enjoyable area of managing your home? All of it. I feel blessed to own a home and even more, own a home I love.


32. What was your most challenging area of home management? My office, playing defense to the boys and their messes... and tackling dog hair. UGh.

33. What was your single biggest time waster in your life this past year? Hmm probably games on my iPhone. And Facebook. I've been trying to cut back.


34. What was the best way you used your time this past year? Just sitting down and playing with the boys. Doing projects with them. Coloring with them. Building blocks and train tracks.

35. What do you wish you’d done more of? Scrapbooking, keeping up on photography bookwork (I have a long road ahead to get ready for filing taxes!) and somehow archiving all of my pictures/blog into Blurb Books.

36. What do you wish you’d done less of?
 Yelling and making impulse purchases.

37. What was the best book you read?
 Hands down, The Parent;s Handbook. But, DANG sadly I AGAIN did not read for fun. Wait! I read Smotherhood. It only took me about 6 months, but it was a good book! I did get 3 new books for Christmas so I'm going to make time to read them.


38. What was your favorite TV program?
 Real Housewives (any of them), Flipping Out, Teen Mom, 16 and Pregnant, Millionaire Matchmaker

39. What was your favorite movie of this year?
 No favorites, I don't think. I did like these, though. Inception, How to Train Your Dragon, Toy Story 3, Salt, Bounty Hunter and What Happens in Vegas

40. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? LOVE Gerard Butler, Ashton Kutcher, Owen Wilson, Matthew McConaughey

41. What did you want and get?
 My kitchen remodel finished!

42. What did you want and not get?
 A full time job

43. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
 Getting hired into a full time teaching position at Bean.

44. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
 Smooshed. Because I'm at an ultimate high in the weight department. Must get that under control.

45. What kept you sane?
 Medication and knowing that "this too shall pass..."

46. What political issue stirred you the most?
 None, really.

47. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010.
 Sometimes you just have to build a bridge and get over it.

48. What song will always remind you of 2010?
 Hmm.... Christina Perri "Jar of Hearts"... I first heard it on Sirius Radio on tv and instantly loved the tune. Words aren't too symbolic, but I love her voice.Rihanna/Eminem "Love the Way You Lie"- Eminem reminds me of Girls Weekend in October... we heard it a lot on the radio. And Black Eyed Peas "Boom Boom Pow" reminds me of Zumba!

49. How did you ring in the New Year? The boys and I made Shrinky Dinks, we all ate chicken tenders and rice. Ry and Porter played the Wii while Hudson and I played blocks. We put the boys to bed and then Ryan and I watched a movie and I scrapbooked. BORRRRINNG. Its 11:52 as I type and I don't even plan on watching the ball drop.


50. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. Hmm... I can think of a few.

Jason Mraz "Live High"

Live high
Live mighty
Live righteously
Taking it easy
Live high, live mighty
Live righteously

Eminem "Not Afraid"

I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand

We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road

But this, by far, is my favorite. Jason Mraz "Details in the Fabric"

If it's a broken part, replace it

If it's a broken arm, then brace it

If it's a broken heart, then face it

And hold your own

Know your name

And go your own way

Hold your own

Know your name

And everything will be fine

And go your own way

Who takes after who?

My children have been plastered all over the blog... picture after picture after picture.  So, you know what THEY look like.  But WHO exactly do they take after?  I'm always shocked when I hear who people think the boys look like.  Ok, Porter.  No one seems to know who Hudson looks like.  Maybe its the blonde hair, but I have a pretty good inkling who his twin is.  

Here are a bunch of pictures of Ryan and I as babies/toddlers.  What's the verdict.... who takes after who?

Ryan:

And now Nicole:::

High School Tag

I found this tag on Danette's blog (forever ago) and thought it'd be fun to reminisce. Even more fun, though, I think would be to have some friends answer a few of these questions for me! I might add that at the end.

1. Did you date someone from your school? Yes. I dated a few guys early in high school- very non-serious relationships. I started dating Ryan halfway through my sophomore year. We broke up my senior year and then I dated someone else from another school for awhile before Ryan and I mended things.

2. What kind of car did you drive? 1987 Pontiac Grand Am

3. What was the most embarrassing moment of HS? Gosh I can't think of one in particular....

4. Were you a party animal? Hmm... I wouldn't consider myself a party animal, but I did go to parties, and often threw a few myself when my mom wasn't home. The summer after my senior year, though, I partied a lot.

5. Were you considered a flirt? Definitely not.

6. Were you in band, orchestra, or choir? Nope.

7. Were you a nerd? Hmm... not as far as I think. (Junior high, though...ooooh that's another story!)

8. Were you on any varsity teams? No

9. Did you get suspended/expelled? No

10. Can you still sing the fight song? Of course!

Go, Mounties on to fame.
All cheer for Northwest.
Fight unto victory and beat all the rest.
Rah! Rah! Rah!
Hail to the red and black.
Long may they fly.
In our hearts you'll always be dearest.
Northwest High.

11. Who were your favorite teachers? Mrs. Hebert the art teacher, Mrs. Pop for science, and the French teacher who hell I can't remember her name!!

12. Where did you sit during lunch? In the cafeteria with my friends, or often I'd leave school with Ryan and his friends and go get lunch (which, I should mention- was not allowed).

13. School mascot? Mountie

14. Did you go to homecoming, and with who? I think I went to one... but probably with girlfriends. Other than that, I don't recall going to homecoming dances.

15. If you could go back and do it again, would you? Probably not.

16. What do you remember most about graduation?

17. Where did you go senior skip day? Senior skip day doesn't stand out to me... I skipped school randomly so that wasn't a huge day for me.

18. Were you in any clubs? No.

19. Have you gained some weight since then? Yep, don't we all?

20. Who was your prom date? I went to Ryan's junior prom (my sophomore year), and to my junior prom the following year with Ryan. And my senior prom with Adam Olney (from another school)

21. Are you planning on going to your 10 year reunion? I'd like to if we have one. But then again, with Facebook its like a daily reunion LOL!

22. Looking back, what advice would you give yourself? Have more confidence!!

Chantilly Lace

1997-ish?

Today I took the boys to see my first pride and joy... Chantilly Lace... aka Lacey. I blogged about her awhile back... I can't believe it has been 14 years since I first met Lacey.... both of us pretty green at riding and, well, horses in general. We had quite the time learning together... me learning what made her tick and her learning how to do what I asked. I'll admit, there was much trial and error as I had no business owning a 3 year old green broke horse. However, I think we both came out of it pretty darn well and had some amazing memories.

I feel so lucky that here we are... 14 years later... and MY KIDS are able to share the joy of Lacey with me. It was so great to see my boys love on her and enjoy riding her. I drove home today thinking... WHY don't I go riding more often? I can ride any darn time I want, and I'm so so lucky that I have that privilege, and I don't take advantage of it.

Well, this summer I am going to take advantage of my time off. I need to and want to. I hope to take Porter to ride with me... he really enjoyed Lacey and has talked non-stop about going back to see her.

And I also hope to get some time to ride with Barbie again soon. I miss my teenage years riding with her... spending hours on horseback in the country chit chatting about everything under the sun.


Hudson, my sweet and loving boy... I hoisted him up on Lacey and he grinned. He grinned so big and laid down on her back to hug her... grinning the whole time. I ran to get my camera (Barbie was near him), and of course when I had it, he had turned the other way.


Porter was really unsure about her. She is intimidating, I'll admit. He didn't want to sit on her bareback but once I saddled her up and got on, he wanted to ride with me. He even let me trot her... riding with me and with me leading her.

Reflections

I was thinking today that we're coming up on our 1-year anniversary of owning our house! I thought it was pretty interesting the change our house has gone through in the past year, as well as the changes our family has gone through in the past few years.

June 28, 2009:

(More photos of the foyer and pictures up the stairs on this post)

June 28, 2008: Not quite homeowners again, but working towards it....




June 28, 2007: Vacationing in Florida



June 29, 2006: Itty bitty Porter!!

Reflections

A fun little questionnaire to reflect on the past year. I found it on All & Sundry's blog last year (she has posted it again this year) and I think it'll be so fun to look back on it and read the previous years' answers.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?


2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I honestly don't remember what my resolution was last year. I will make one this year... and try to keep it simple. I'm going to try to be the best person I can be and to try to grow in positive ways and be influenced by positive people/things. 


3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
 Does myself count? And yes... Heather, my sister, had Addisen; Missy had Carter; Katie had Nolan; Kim Turpin had Callie; Mandi had Maya, Denise had Boston and Cooper; WOW! The year of the babies!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
 Yes, Cathy my mother-in-law

5. What states/countries did you visit?
 Chicago, IL was the only place we went outside of Michigan.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
 Money. Can I have money, please? Oh, and patience?

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?


May 20th- Hudson's birthday
July 14th- the date we closed on our house
August 15th- our camping trip to Silver Lake
September 13th and 14th- the weekend Cathy passed away

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Becoming a better person throughout the trials I've faced this year. Recognizing my shortcomings, facing my demons, attempting to improve myself.

9. What was your biggest failure?
 Losing my patience with Porter so often.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
 if you count losing your mind numerous times an illness...

11. What was the best thing you bought?
 Our new house

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
 Hudson... can you say Super Baby?

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
 there are a few I can think of

14. Where did most of your money go?
 into our new-fixer-upper-house.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
 The addition of Hudson and our new house (omg... see a trend here?)

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?


17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? 
 happier
b) thinner or fatter? 
 thinner
c) richer or poorer?
 poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
 yelling and worrying about what other people think.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
 We spent Christmas at home with our families. It was wonderful!

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
 Most definitely. With my new baby boy, with Porter as he made me so proud being such a great big brother and with my husband- for sticking by me through some trying times.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
 Desperate Housewives. Its all I watch since we don't have DVR anymore.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
 I wouldn't say 'hate'

24. What was the best book you read?
 Llama, Llama Mad at Mama.... sadly kid books are all I've read this past year!

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
 I got an ipod... that counts, right? Although I still have only taken it out of the box to look at it HAHA!

26. What did you want and get?
 a new house

27. What did you want and not get?
 a new job

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
 oh hell... no idea

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
 27... and I did nothing but attempt to clean a messy house and take care of two cranky boys. Sadly... no cake, no special dinner, nada.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more
satisfying?
 While it was a year of trials and celebration, I'm not sure anything could have made it "immeasurably" more satisfying. We had a very blessed year. If I had to pick something it'd probably be to have gotten a full time teaching position, but I do have a job I love that provides for us and pays our bills and I'm thankful for that. So, I guess I can't really say anything for sure.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
 a repetitive disaster

32. What kept you sane?
 medication, probably

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
 Fancy? Who uses the word fancy anymore?

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
 Everyone dogging on Barak Obama... come on people... buck up, be American and support our new president!

35. Who did you miss?
 Cathy

36. Who was the best new person you met?
 Smiley, Smiley Hudson Riley

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
 Live life to its fullest. Lots of life lessons... see this post.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. Hmm... awhile ago I heard the old song by Meredith Brokks, I'm a Bitch. Thought it seemed fitting for me for some reason HAHA!

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your health, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

So take me as I am
This may mean you'll have to be a stronger man
Rest assured that when I start to make you nervous
and I'm going to extremes
tomorrow I will change
and today won't mean a thing

**ETA** Another song that I think will always remind me of 2008:
Little Wonders- Rob Thomas

Let it go
Let it roll right off your shoulder
Don't you know
The hardest part is over
Let it in
Let your clarity define you
In the end
We will only just remember how it feels

Our lives are made
In these small hours
These little wonders
These twists and turns of fate
Time falls away,
But these small hours
These small hours
Still remain

Let it slide
Let your troubles fall behind you
Let it shine,
Till you feel it all around you
And I don't mind
If it's me you need to turn to
We'll get by
It's the heart that really matters in the end

39. How did you ring in the New Year? We had a "Good Fortune for 2009" Potluck/Game Night with a bunch of amazing friends. It was a great way to ring in the New Year!

40. Do you have a goal for 2009? I think my goal is going to be to get back into running. I got new running shoes for Christmas, an ipod, the Nike + system and basically I'm all ready to run... I just need the motivation. I am also going to try to make a goal of reading more books for myself.

OMG

Was he ever seriously this little?!

I'm looking through pictures from the past year for some Christmas projects and I'm just so stunned at how... teensy he looks!

27 Years: And still a Work In Progress

I'd have to say Year 26 has quite possibly been the hardest year of my life. There was a year or so in High School that I thought was terrible (requested therapy, had lots of emotional breakdowns...) but I think this trumps it. From turning into Super Bitch during my pregnancy, attempting to restore our marriage, selling our house (FINALLY!), having a baby and moving just 2 weeks later, living out of boxes in my mom/grandpa's house, dealing with trying to purchase a foreclosed home, moving AGAIN, and then the death of my mother-in-law. It's been trying. And I think of all the things that you read about marriages going to shambles in the midst of trauma and Ryan and I are actually so much better for the worse of it (maybe has to do with the fact that I'm not a Pregnant Bitch anymore?).

It's also been a year of celebrations.... we have another healthy, beautiful addition to our family, we are both still employed and able to afford groceries and gas (haha!), and we have purchased a new, larger home that we are absolutely in love with.

This past year has not gone by without some great things learned. Especially with the passing of Cathy I've taken on the mantra "Live life to the fullest." You never, ever know when you'll be leaving this earth and you really should fully soak in all that life has to offer. I thought I'd list some things of wisdom... big and small... I feel that I've caught onto this year. I know there is so much more to learn in the future and for that I'm excited.

I've learned..

• that you should live life to the fullest...
  
• that good things DO happen to good people... sometimes it just takes time.
• to speak my mind and be open with others... when applicable
• there are many situations where you feel it warrants your opinion, but know which ones warrant your mouth staying shut. Honesty is not always the best policy... sometimes others can't accept it.
• to be more patient... reading back in a journal my mom wrote to me she expressed the same regret I know I will face... she wishes she had been more patient with us when we were little (then again, don't we all?!)
• that wallpaper is wicked stuff... and not in a good way.
  
• that blogging is so so important. Not only for past memory purpose but also the community it creates for you. Friends around the world that care about you and you might not even know it until you least expect it.
  
• you should never regret taking too many pictures. They are the key to triggering past memory and they will forever capture and embrace those important and even boring day-to day moments in your life.
• that sisters (and sister-in-laws) are important... tend to those relationships no matter how different you think you may be.
• that clothing is optional... especially when you're 2 years old and potty training.
  
• you should never give up your girls-nights-out... girlfriends (and couple friends with your spouse) are important! You never know when your spouse will be gone and you'll need those shoulders, those ears or that company.
  
• not to worry about what others think or say about your life... especially when it pertains to your family, husband or kids.
  
• a bigger home means lots more cleaning... and that there is a blessing to be found in having small bathrooms!
• sometimes the things you think you'll have the hardest time accepting are the easiest to love
• family will always be there for you... no matter how rotten you have been
• laundry really does have a way of multiplying
  
• friendships are ever evolving, always changing and taking new shape, sometimes even fading away. True friendships though, come back full circle when the time is right.
• having everyone (or almost everyone) together for the holidays is the BEST!

So, here's to 27 years.... Cheers!

New blog title: OMG I'm Going To Have An Effing Coronary

Let's just say, like Maria, I had a crap-hole of a day.

It didn't start out too bad. I had a cute outfit. And accessories, to boot. My hair was decent. The boys were in great moods this morning. Blah blah blah.

Work was fine, except for a minor issue with a co-worker. Can't go into that on here but it really isn't a huge deal- I really want to be vague about it but I won't even attempt that as I don't really know who is reading.

It all started when I got home, I guess. I had a great plan for the evening: get home at 4:15, get dinner ready and eat as soon as Ryan gets home. Then head over to Lowe's to compare prices of garage door openers and entry door handle sets. We'd come home, get the boys in bed and clean the house that evening.

Wasn't going to happen.

I drove up to the house to see garbage still sitting outside our front door from the garage sale. And a huge pile of garbage sitting outside the back door by the garage. Ryan can dump our garbage for free at his work, so we haven't signed up for garbage service as of yet, thinking we'd save a few bucks a month since, gee... how hard is it to load a bag or two of garbage into the car on your way to work?

I walked in the house and was greeted with the lovely arouma of dog doo. Nice. I sped through the house to find out where it was and found it residing in the toy room. Great!

I brought the boys in, pushed aside my idea of getting dinner on right away, and went to town cleaning up poo. Then I realized she PEED in the toy room too (Ramsey, that is). GRR. And as I was trekking back and forth from the kitchen to playroom I realized MORE scratches on the hardwood floor in our hallway (the floor I redid just months ago!). GRARR! I grabbed the phone book and called the groomer to have Ramsey taken in and her toenails trimmed. Although I'd REALLY like to just have her freaking declawed. She's the dumb kind of dog who always tries to run or get somewhere fast, but she can never get her body to go along with her feet. Enter: dug up wood floors.

Porter kept getting in my way, he was running around with peed on pants from LeeAnn's (he'd tried to pee just as we were leaving and had mis-aimed and got his pants, so I just left them on and figured I'd change them as soon as we got home).

I finally got the dog stuff cleaned up and went to let the dogs out only to find Zoey had busted one of the rails on our dog gate. And then as I was getting dinner ready, Porter decided to put toilet paper in the bathroom sink and then attempt to wipe his ass with the sopping wet toilet paper.

Then Porter ran around with just a shirt, despite my numerous request to go get a pair of shorts out of his drawer. He kept trying to go outside naked and got yelled at and just plain ticked me off.

At this point I got a phone call from Ryan saying that he had to work late. Great.

I chose that moment to remember that I was nearly 3 weeks late on taking Hudson's montly picture with his bear... so I figured while the rice was simmering and chicken was grilling I'd go snap a few photos. I got carried away and realized the chicken was still on the grill so I ran out to turn off the grill. Not burnt, but a little dry.

I really wanted to make a margarita, but I knew it'd only create more mess, more dishes for me.

We managed to eat dinner with a minimal amount of irritation, although Porter still has a hatred towards silveware. The kid can use it, but its so much faster for him to grab food and shovel it in with his hands. Damn table manners.

After dinner I attempted to clean up- the stove was disgusting after a week of meals being cooked and not being cleaned. The kitchen floor had crumbs on it sticking to my feet. The countertop was dirty and cluttered. I cleaned everythign up, swept the kitchen floor and decided why not mop it?

Well, do I have a mop? I guess not.

So, hands and knees it is, dress pants and all.

And of course since I told Porter to stay out of the kitchen it would then become the most desired place on earth to be. And as he continually runs back and forth from the dining room back around to the hallway, just to stand riiiight on the edge of the kitchen floor, asking me every 3.4 minutes "Whatcha doin' mommy?" What the hell does it look like I'm doing? What was I doing the LAST time you asked that?

Ryan finally got home and took the kids off my hands so I could finish mopping the dining room and foyer. Err.. hand mopping, I suppose it'd be.

I finally chilled out after Ryan got a few things done on my honey-do-list and Porter got settled down with a movie.

Sigh. I hate bad days.

Nicole: Hair Throughout the Years

I thought it would be fun to visit all my old haircuts throughout my teenange/adult years. I do have some funny childhood haircuts I should post, but maybe another time. So, shall we begin?

Oh my.. here I am about 11 years old maybe? I can't remember... (grandma... maybe you can
refresh my memory as to what year we went to Disney?). I know you're totally jealous of my leggins and my fanny pack. Totally. Whenever I picture my hair short, I think of this haircut. Eww.

Oh! Do you recognize these girls? This was 6th grade. Leslie and I... What the HELL are we wearing? Do you see the lace choker around my neck with the gaudy 'gold' heart dangling from it?

Here we are onto my barn days... I bought Lacey when I was 13 (with my own hard earned money!) and from day one I was addicted. I lived at the barn. Good thing, though, as it kept me out of trouble for a good part of my teen years. Bad thing for my image... I was a total nerd. And I probably smelled like horse and barn many days at school. Gross!Here's another short haircut (but not the shortest!) Ryan and I in 1998
And... here's the super short haircut. Reminds me now of Dharma and Greg.

I am not sure exactly when this picture was taken...I know it was my senior year, probably the summer after (2000). I'm sure all of us hooched up girls were on our way out to some kind of house party or something. (Do you recognize the girl in the orange?)
I almost didn't recognize Ryan in this picture! He looks so young! This picture was his 21st birthday in 2002. My hair is still pretty short!

Goth queen? No, not really. Just a bad choice of color for my hair- I tried a different "box" color that time and I think it actually had turned a weird purplish color. I used Herbal Essence or something and I will never use it again!
This was in 2004 when we went to Mexico (ahh... Mexico...). Oh to be that skinny and stretch-mark free again!

Me in 2005- I think I actually was just days from finding out I was pregnant with Porter. I loved my hair then.

A few months later, I went a bit shorter...

Here is me in Chicago this spring 2008.... long hair, again. I think I had pretty long hair from about 2003 to 2008 with a few semi-shorter shoulder length cuts inbetween those years. Wow... 5 years!
And... drumroll please.... the Before/After from yesterday:



Its a little shorter in the front than I had envisioned (I think I would like it to be an inch or smidge more below my chin in the front... but it'll grow-that's what hair does, right?) . I like it though! I think it'll be super easy to style in the mornings while getting ready with two kiddos under foot. Gawd... I'm such a mooooom!