Frustration

I'm irritated, moody, and just plain bitchy today. I thought we'd have the repairs done on the house by this weekend so we could have the inspector out today and hopefully close next Monday (seeing that this Friday is 4th of July and a lot of people will have Friday and possibly Thursday off...). Well, the stairwell to the apartment didn't get finished. It also didn't get finished tonight. Not that I blame my dear hubby. He's been working so hard, and his dad has also been exhausting himself helping Ryan try to get these things done. Its just been the two of them all week. His dads truck also broke down on Friday, so tonight when we were at Menards (home improvement store for those of you who don't have one), we went to pick up the last few sheets of paneling for the ceiling in the apartment- hoping to get this finished tonight and have the inspections tomorrow. Well, we then realized that we didn't have a vehicle to get the 4'x8' sheets home, and whats more- Ryan didn't have anyone to help put the paneling on the ceiling. I had to take the boys home to get them in bed.

This whole freaking repair thing is just irritating the hell out of me.

I hate that we're spending money on stupid repairs that we wouldn't have put as a priority to do right away. There are SO many other things I'd rather have spent money on.

I hate that I am stuck with the boys all day and all night. And I really just want to be helping Ryan get things done at the house. Its a little hard to do that with a 2 year old and 5 week old in tow. I wish we were able to LIVE in the house right now as we'd then at least be able to put the boys to bed at 7 and we could both work throughout the evening.

I'm also just plain sick of not having my own home. I'm sick of living in someone else's house. I have exhausted many of our sitters this past week (thank you Grandma, Cathy and Heather!!) so that I could get things done. And I've thought may times this past week that I wish I could call the girl who babysat Porter for me last summer to come babysit so that I could help with house stuff, or run errands, or get my hair cut, but I can't really hire a sitter because I'm not living at my own home. Yeah, I could have her come to my mom/grandpa's house but its such a pain to keep an eye on Porter when my grandpa is doing repairs around the house and he wants to be in the way. And what babysitter wants to babysit when there are other people in the house too? I hated that when I was a teen babysitting. I also have clients I need to schedule this month and I am not sure when we'll be moving, when I'll be able to get a sitter to do the sessions and when I'll even have time to proof them, order and package and ship them. I don't have an office here and I don't have any privacy from the boys during the day to even get work done.

Its just all so frustrating. I want things back to normal. I want to be HOME. I want to be just the 4 of us together in our own house. I want Ryan and I to be able to spend our evenings together working on house stuff, chatting about our ideas and plans and dreams for our new home. I want the boys to sleep in their own bedrooms and I want Porter to have all his toys back again.

I'm just over this temporary move thing. I want these stupid repairs to get finished. I wish we had the money to have just hired someone to do the work, or that Ryan had other reliable help in addition to his dad.

Wow. What a whiney post. I was all chipper yesterday, but c'mon. We're getting down to the wire. Really we have until about Weds to get the appraiser out as who knows if he'll be available last minute so close to a holiday weekend. So that'd push the appraisal to the following week. UGH!