Hudson likes to sleep with a sucky (aka... pacifier). He likes his blanky tucked up over his shoulder next to his cheek and his sucky in his mouth.
I don't mind him having a sucky at this point, but I don't plan (key word is "plan"... as in... it could change...) to let him have it much past a year old. At that point I feel its more of an attachment device rather than a soother. I guess I think that much past 6 months its more of an attachment device, but I guess we'll see where we end up. Porter pretty much self weaned off his sucky by 4 or 5 months old. He just didn't prefer it.
Hudson, on the other hand, loves his. He doesn't really get to suck it if its not naptime or bedtime. And there are times he'll drift off without his sucky, but for the past few nights its been a necessity for him or he fusses. He's a great sleeper... he goes to sleep completely on his own (as in... we put him in bed wide awake, plug him in, tuck in his blanky and he drifts off to slumberland solo).
And then here comes the trouble... he's been falling asleep and then for the next few hours waking continually and fussing when it falls out of his mouth. And I am so not cool with that. I don't mind plugging it in and then kissing him goodnight but I refuse to continually walk into his room to replug his face. No thank you very much.
So... I'm trying to decide what to do... do I start weaning him from the sucky now? Is he at an age where his sucky isn't really a "soothing device" anymore? Do I keep plugging him in and see if he works out this kink?
I guess I just don't want him to become dependent on his sucky to sleep and I don't want it to become a habit that is hard to break. I don't want to have wars with him dropping it in the middle of the night or throwing it out of his crib and then screaming. I'm torn between letting him continue to have his sucky and hopefully in a few months he'll wean off of it (if I were to pick my ideal scenario)- or if I should start weaning him now and avoid a further attachment.
What are your opinions? When are suckys no longer a soother but an attachment? How long did your kids have a sucky? What was the deal breaker decision that made you get rid of it? How did you get wean them from it?
Ah, the sucky. Well, Reyna is in love with hers. I think she will probably taking it with her to college. Do I wish I would have weaned her when she was little? Yes. But, I also think it will be better when she can say goodbye to it on her own as opposed to getting it taken away and she has no clue why or where it went. I don't know.
ReplyDeleteReyna used to wake up sometimes if it had fallen out of her mouth. She got into the habit of finding it herself and going back to sleep.
I would prefer a sucky over a thumb only b/c you can take the sucky away.
As far as taking it away now, do what feels right. Everyone is always going to have their opinion, but it's your opinion that matters most when it comes to deciding. :)
Lukas had his "binky" until he was 12 months. Not really attached to it, just had it when he was in the car, and went to sleep. Why in the car, I don't know. Maybe we started giving it to him in the car because it would soothe him from being restrained in the carrier. As for the sleeping issue, we did battle that too. I remember him waking up and just being able to plop that bink back in his mouth made him happy and fall back to sleep. But it was pretty bothersome to have to get up to do that. When we decided it was time for him to get rid of it, we just didnt offer it to him. He really didnt ask for it, we just routinely plopped it in his mouth. So it wasn't hard to him to give it up. I agree with Leslie and would prefer the baby to have a bink over a thumb. So maybe letting him have the bink a little longer, will keep his thumb away from becoming a habit!
ReplyDeleteI wish my children took a pacifier!! They are BOTH finger suckers - same to fingers even. They both started at about 3 months. I pushed the paci - having heard that finger/thumb suckers can run in families. I also did not want to get up in the night to put the paci in so our girls got used to not having it. Little did we know that for us that would lead to finger sucking - paci would fall out, fingers would go in.
ReplyDeleteNorah at 4 STILL sucks fingers. We have a rule, though, if she sucks them during the day, she must go to her room to bed. Needless to say, she doesn't suck them during the day - only to sleep. Since I can't cut them off - I don't know what I will do!! Maybe I should blog about this myself to get suggestions.
Sorry I'm no help!!
I like binkies. :)
ReplyDeleteYes, they're annoying to have to plug 'em back in for a couple of months till they can get it back in themselves, but I'd much rather that that have a kid who likes to suck find his thumb or fingers and get in that habit. I always prayed if my kids needed something it would be a pacifier rather than a thumb. Much easier to regulate!
Savannah never used one when she was a baby. She didn't need it I guess. Sawyer on the other hand was a huge sucker! He would have loved to have that thing in his mouth non stop for the first few weeks if we had let him! Luckily he easily settled into only needing it to sleep and if he was fussy in the car. That's always been our rule... only for bed or in the car (ah, quiet in the car!!). I can't stand kids walking around with binks in their mouths all the time!
Anyway, I remember those couple of months between like three and four where it seemed like I was doing an awful lot of binkie situating. But before long they get the hang of keeping it in their mouth, or else figure out how to get it back in themselves. I kind of liked the attachment, just like with a special blanket or a lovey... it's a cue and a comfort that makes it easier for them to fall asleep faster. I like that because he wasn't always in his own bed for bedtime and that made it just that much easier to be portable.
Anyway. Since Sawyer only had it to sleep, it never really bothered me, we didn't even notice it much since we hardly saw it outside of his bed, and we didn't help him give it up until he was almost 2 1/2. And it wasn't really a big deal, because he at least understood rather than all of a sudden just being without.
Blah, blah, blah. All that to say, I don't think they're a bad attachment for sleeping. I thought it came in pretty handy.
Do what you're most comfortable with... he'll figure it out!
Hi Nicole. I pop over to your blog occasionally & enjoy reading about your family.
ReplyDeleteOur Pedi told us that he has found that 15 months is the easiest time to get rid of the paci. We just took it away from Elle at that time & she didn't bat an eye & she hadn't slept w/o it her entire life. We did ween her down to only having it at nap/bed time around 9 month.
It was beautiful!
I'd just let him have it - you'll know when the right time is to get rid of it. Until 6 months or so, they have such a strong reflex to suck.
ReplyDeleteMorgan was a thumb sucker (still is, at night) and Callie has a sucky but still ends up sucks her fingers, it's what soothes her.
Everyone is so down on thumb/finger suckers but really, there isn't much you can do about it if that's what your kid does!
They will all stop at one point (soother/thumb/fingers), I wouldn't worry about it.
Hudson sounds EXACTLY like Gavin when he was a baby. He has ALWAYS been an excellent sleeper and he has always loved his binky. We generally would only let him have it at nap time or bed time, starting about 4 months or so. We went through some times where he would wake up if it fell out of his mouth. Yeah, it's not fun but it is better than a screaming/crying baby. I don't think there is anything wrong with babies using them, as long as they aren't abusing them...does that make sense? We just recently started putting Gavin to bed without his and he is fine (I wish I would have done it sooner, since he doesn't seem to care). Out of sight, out of mind. I think if he is still wanting it right now then you should roll with it. Just make sure you only allow it during naptime/bedtime and that's all. He will eventually wean off of it. It might even turn out to be a huge help when he starts teething (we used to put Gavin's in the freezer and the cold binky helped soothe his gums at night). Good luck! Let us know how it goes.
ReplyDeletemax was a sucking machine and he still uses his at naptime and bedtime. we don't let him have it any other time... maybe on occasion in the car, but we try to only let him have it then if he's supposed to be napping in the car, or we're on the way home to nap/bedtime.
ReplyDeletewe had about a month or so, probably around 3-4 months old, where he would lose it and couldn't get it back himself, so i'd get up and put it back in for him around 4 in the morning. then he'd sleep until 6 or so. it was a pain but only once per night for us, the time was pretty short in the grand scheme of things and i would have rather done that than feed him to soothe him and get him used to feeding at night (kid needed to suck on SOMETHING :). ever since it's been fairly easy, just remembering to bring it with us when we go somewhere and maybe every once in awhile go in and pick it up for him if he's thrown it out of his crib. but that's pretty rare.
i'm not going to worry about taking it from him until he's two or so (maybe awhile before we move him from his crib). it is a definite cue for him that it's time to settle down and go to sleep. i guess i don't know about the soother vs attachment thing. it's both. is it really bad if it's an attachment? i mean he's attached to his blanket as well but i won't be taking that away from him any time soon, kwim?
as far as taking it away when they are older, i have done some reading on forums and such and most kids seem to have a pretty easy time with it surprisingly. i know that with max we've had situations where we haven't had it available (at grandma's or something) and he did manage to get to sleep just fine.
having said all this, this is just what works for me, i think you just need to decide what works for you and hudson. :)
I used a Soothie with Renee when she was a newborn and we NEEDED it or I would have been nursing every fifteen seconds. Not exactly my idea of a good time. She started spitting it out at me around 4 months and I never offered a replacement. She sucked on her hand for a long time (gross) but gave that up on her own too. Now she chews on her blankie at night but I think that has more to do with teething than needing to suck. She will STILL wake me up in the night once or twice a week if she loses her blankie and can't find it so I'm not sure if I really avoided any trouble or not. I have never had to "take one away" so I don't have any advice there other than if you're not pushing it, they will find something else to occupy their mouths (at least mine did)!
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